Matrescence- The Spiritual Awakening of Motherhood
Matrescence is the definition to describe the radical metamorphosis that a woman experiences when she moves through pregnancy, childbirth, postpartum and beyond.
Motherhood is such a primal, natural act, that society places a high expectation on mothers. This pushes aside the immense rite of passage that her whole being experiences in mind, body, soul, and physiology.
The umbrella term of matrescence gives light and meaning to the evolution that’s occurring within women throughout this time.
This metamorphosis is like a second puberty, where hormones are rife and imbalanced, emotions are powerful, her body changes and is taken over by an instinctual force, with one goal in mind. To sustain life.
Our society is overwhelmed with abundant resources for birthing our children, but there’s a lack of teachings on a second birth that’s occurring intrinsically.
The birth of the mother.
As a mother is being born, the symptoms and experiences are reflections of the birth of her child. It’s rich in passion, learning, awe, and love, but can also accompany pain, sadness, overwhelm, and a raw depth of emotion that’s never been felt before.
There can be a grieving process to such an experience. Read more about this here.
This is the beginning of a woman shedding her old skin, to find the fresh new self underneath. The true self.
This force leads you to face and honour all that wasn’t met for you as a child and as a woman.
This is so that you can become all your baby needs, leading you to embody the truth of who you are, separate from the life you have birthed.
The Importance of Telling Your Matrescence Story
The thing is, instead of focusing on this vulnerable transformation of a new identity, the emphasis is on the development of the baby.
It goes without saying, that the health of our children is imperative. But when did we forget that the positive development of children, is entirely dependent on the care and understanding of mothers?
Mother and her child are interconnected from the first moment that they become to be.
Within the womb, every experience, nourishment, environmental factor, stress, and relationship, is directly transmuted to her baby through hormones, survival responses, her nervous system, and the baby’s senses like hearing.
The unique story of a woman, as well as the psychological and physical experience she’s moving through, is so important to bring to light, as this is directly connected to her parenting and being able to show up holistically for her child.
You can read more about the transition of matrescence and get involved in the normalisation of this experience here.
Awareness and Expression Are the Opposite of Dysregulation.
Within our society, the role of a mother comes with exhaustion, expectations, endless responsibilities, judgement, and emotional dysregulation at the hands of it all.
Many times, this is then met with a cycle of stress, burn-out, mental health difficulties, and then a shame, guilt, and grief cycle for not being able to ‘live up’ to the impossible expectations placed on mothers.
This all causes an immense dysregulation within a mother’s nervous system, which leads to the main priority of motherhood being difficult…
Being present, caring, and being able to role model healthy regulation.
By bringing awareness to the powerful life-changing process of matrescence, we are normalising a mother’s needs and the ability to receive.
This leads mothers to be able to honour this transformation and take back control of their behaviours, so they can learn from their experiences and become more in touch with the emotions of their children.
Learning, Changing & Expanding Your Ancestry
When we birth a child, we are not only birthing a new life or a new identity but we are given the chance to change the course of our ancestry.
It’s not rare for many to have dysfunctional family dynamics, childhood trauma, a disconnect from our ancestry, or even just an experience with parenting that we wish would have been done differently.
Now is our chance.
Becoming a parent has a way of reminding you, and mirroring your childhood back to you, through the observation and experience of your child, and you as a parent.
It’s been found that mothers end up parenting with the same style that they were mothered as a child, just like theirs would have been influenced by their mother.
You Can Let Your Parent Be the Influence, or You Can Influence Your Parenting
You can take back your power at any given moment. And there’s nothing more empowering than the many roads, teachings, and freedom to be embodied as a parent, for you and your child.
We are all directly influenced by our parents. Some behaviours, thoughts, and feelings will be deeply engrained, whereas some may be easier to discard.
This is normal and isn’t your fault. It will not happen overnight, but you can always reevaluate and reinvent yourself as a parent, in a way that fits with your values, beliefs and ethics.
You can take the experience of how you were parented as a child and allow this to be your learning experience. Each thought, feeling or behaviour that you have which triggers you, makes you feel sorry, or doesn’t sit right with your body, is a clue to what you can tend to.
The truth is parenting is not about being perfect. This is a myth.
It’s about endlessly growing, expanding, and learning from our experiences of ourselves, the world, and others so that we can model this healthily and safely for our children. This includes making mistakes and owning up to them! Read more about Conscious Parenting here.
To bring awareness to the way you parent and how you’d like to parent is the beginning of making changes. Once we reevaluate, we can sit with what we resonate with. What we’re passionate about. What we want for our children, and most importantly, what we don’t want.
In turn, we are curating a powerful change within our ancestral line, which will lead to our children and their children parenting with awareness, ease, authenticity, and radical responsibility.
This transformation begins in matrescence, peaks in postpartum, and guides us forever to step into who we are at our core. This leads the way for our children and directly affects our ancestry.
The Metamorphosis from woman to mother
A woman births new life from her body,
Becoming reborn
on a physical, psychological, and emotional level,
It isn’t just a concept,
but a truth.
She will never be the same again.
Just like adolescence,
the transition is of hormonal surges,
body changes,
shifts in identity,
and relationships.
Motherhood strips your masks,
false pretences,
your layers,
unveiling the depths
of who you are,
underneath.
Of course,
it’s overwhelming.
You are at the gates
of something monumental.
You are meeting someone
brand new.
The reflection you’ve seen
your whole life,
has evolved.
A mother is born.
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